Thursday, November 14, 2013

Tennis star admits to doping

Tennis-player admits taking performance-enhancing drugs over a 15-year period from 1996 to 2011
By Lance Armstærk
Danish tenis-player Hans Háfjall has admitted for the first time that he was operating while intoxicated during all his SlamBangian performances from 1996 to 2011, turning his back on years of denials and confessing that his storied career at the top of competitive tennis has been fuelled by performance-enhancing juices.
He is said to have used 100,000 centiliters of Rum, Ouzo and Carlsberg Lager, as well as eating five bags of Kodymagnyles  in case he faced hangover.
Hans Háfjall admitted to doping at a press conference in Thorshavn today.  Háfjall said it was impossible to hit a tennisball without intakes of the variety of the performance-enhancing juices and pills, such was the prevalence of drugs in the sport at the time.  The confession was a dramatic turnaround for a man who has spent two decades defying and threatening to emasculate those who challenged his record.

Háfjall, who failed in a attemp to grap the SlamBangian World Tennis Title in february, has faced long-term allegations of doping since losing to the champion, Claus Holmen at Skånska Championships  where he was unable to answer questions about his location during preparations for the tournement, claiming that he was training in Thorshavn when spotted by several tennisfans in Jamaica.

Dressed smartly in a black blazer, grey shirt, fanzy tie and slacks, Háfjall looked tense and at times bristled while casting himself as a flawed, contrite human being who got caught up in a "culture" of doping, which, he implied, included most SlamBangian athletes of his generation. "It was not me, but Per Holmen who  invented  the culture but I didn't try to stop the culture ... and tennis is now paying the price of that and I'm sorry for that. I didn't have access to anything else that nobody else did."
Rumours of Háfjall’s involvement with doping first started to circulate after his mentor Per Holmen admitted to running a doping ring that included over 10 athletes in a  garage at Bathing Street, Amager.


Rob said...

Agassi admitted to dope. your work is very good. I always liked Agassi

Per Holmen said...

I remember nothing and deny everything. Any liquids injected were and have always been destined the female gender - and not supersportsmen like pictures at this fantastic blog.

Rob said...

Sounds like U ran porn ring :-)

Anonymous said...

Dear Claus Holmen--

I'm over here in the rain forest of the Olympic Peninsula, and don't know what Slambangtennis is, although it sounds like it could be interesting.

Is that an official ?

Best regards

Rhys Beacon

Anonymous said...

Dear Rhys,
Olympic Peninsula? And yes SlamBang is official..somehow.
Best wishes
Claus Holmen

Anonymous said...

Dear Claus,
Olympic Peninsula=holiday
Rhys Beacon